Can you overcome sex addiction? In a word, yes, you can. It’s not easy, but it is possible, and you will be a healthier person for it. Here are three reasons to do the work and break free of sex addiction.
1. Overcome sex addiction for yourself.
Sex addiction is not the same thing as a love and appreciation for sex. Sex is great, and even if you’re having lots of it, it doesn’t mean you’re a sex addict. The key difference is that a sex addict has an unhealthy relationship with sex. Sexual activity is no longer about the pleasure of physically and emotionally connecting with another person, but about fulfilling a compulsion. “Sexual addiction is best described as a progressive intimacy disorder characterized by compulsive sexual thoughts and acts. Like all addictions, its negative impact on the addict and on family members increases as the disorder progresses. Over time, the addict usually has to intensify the addictive behavior to achieve the same results.” -Michael Herkov, Ph.D. No one but you can choose to overcome your own addictions, but like any addiction, you can overcome it. But you have to do it for yourself, no one else, if you want the results to be lasting.
2. Overcome sex addiction for your partner.
Being married to or in an intimate relationship with a sex addict is incredibly trying. Many partners struggle so profoundly with their significant other’s addiction that they feel they have no other choice but to leave. Partners of sex addicts often blame themselves for their partner’s behavior. They may think that they are undesirable, unattractive, or not sexually interesting enough to satisfy their partner’s needs. Of course, in the case of any addiction, it has nothing to do with the addict’s partner at all. But in such an intimate realm, it can be very hard for them to see that fact. If you have a loving, supportive partner, you are extremely fortunate. Overcoming your sexual addiction will bring indescribable healing to your relationship, and hopefully open doors to real intimacy that you never dreamed were possible.
3. Overcome sex addiction for your children.
The consequences of your actions don’t just affect you. They affect your family too. Perhaps more than you know. If you are a parent, I know you want the best for your children. You want them to be healthy, happy, and safe. You want them to have positive, loving relationships. You want them to be good people who make the world better. And when the time comes, you want your children to have healthy, loving sex lives during adulthood. By overcoming sex addiction, you are investing in the long term emotional health of your entire family. Your children are watching your every move, and they learn far more from your actions than they do from your words. You don’t need to be perfect to be a great parent. But you do need to own your own mistakes, ask forgiveness, and work hard to make them right.